Out of the Ashes of My Life
Wednesday, December 12, 2018
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified. Isa. 61:3.
How many times had I been the one listening to the heartbreak of a wife going through a divorce she never dreamed would happen? Now it had happened to me! The shock and disbelief left me numb. My mind reeled as I tried to sort out this cataclysmic emotional trauma from the already heavy pressures of wife, mother, daughter, worker, and church and community volunteer. Dad was ailing and nearing death. Mother was trying to be courageous after a recent leg amputation. Both needed loving support and care. I felt as David did when he mournfully sang, “Faint and badly crushed I groan aloud in anguish of heart” (Ps. 38:8, REB).
Broken under the weight of it all, I staggered outdoors into the mild August evening air. There I found myself in the midst of my vegetable garden, furiously weeding the bean patch. Each clump of weeds felt like an enemy evicted. As I stepped back to view the weeded row with a sense of satisfaction and relief, a sudden pleasing aroma surrounded me. Wondering about its source, I glanced downward. In disbelief I realized I had trampled on my basil plants!
Standing motionless as the quiet fragrance enveloped me, I was impressed that it took “crushing” and “brokenness” to produce the sudden fragrance that had proved such a blessed experience.
Yes, Christ’s body was broken for me and sin crushed Him, bringing forth the fragrant gift of salvation for me! With a deeply thankful heart I prayerfully walked from the garden, nurtured by the object lesson that God could take my “crushed” and “broken” life and make me a fragrance for Him.
After my divorce, while my friends were retiring from work, I found myself enrolled in graduate school, prayerfully pursuing a master’s degree in public health. During this same time a prayer band was praying for someone to start a van ministry in Boston. A week after my graduation the Boston Van Ministry was born out of the ashes of my life, perfumed with crushed basil!
When you feel broken and crushed, remember that God has promised beauty for ashes!
How many times had I been the one listening to the heartbreak of a wife going through a divorce she never dreamed would happen? Now it had happened to me! The shock and disbelief left me numb. My mind reeled as I tried to sort out this cataclysmic emotional trauma from the already heavy pressures of wife, mother, daughter, worker, and church and community volunteer. Dad was ailing and nearing death. Mother was trying to be courageous after a recent leg amputation. Both needed loving support and care. I felt as David did when he mournfully sang, “Faint and badly crushed I groan aloud in anguish of heart” (Ps. 38:8, REB).
Broken under the weight of it all, I staggered outdoors into the mild August evening air. There I found myself in the midst of my vegetable garden, furiously weeding the bean patch. Each clump of weeds felt like an enemy evicted. As I stepped back to view the weeded row with a sense of satisfaction and relief, a sudden pleasing aroma surrounded me. Wondering about its source, I glanced downward. In disbelief I realized I had trampled on my basil plants!
Standing motionless as the quiet fragrance enveloped me, I was impressed that it took “crushing” and “brokenness” to produce the sudden fragrance that had proved such a blessed experience.
Yes, Christ’s body was broken for me and sin crushed Him, bringing forth the fragrant gift of salvation for me! With a deeply thankful heart I prayerfully walked from the garden, nurtured by the object lesson that God could take my “crushed” and “broken” life and make me a fragrance for Him.
After my divorce, while my friends were retiring from work, I found myself enrolled in graduate school, prayerfully pursuing a master’s degree in public health. During this same time a prayer band was praying for someone to start a van ministry in Boston. A week after my graduation the Boston Van Ministry was born out of the ashes of my life, perfumed with crushed basil!
When you feel broken and crushed, remember that God has promised beauty for ashes!
Used by permission of Health Ministries, North American Division of Seventh-day Adventists.
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